Are you ready to break the chains of self-doubt and rediscover trust within yourself?
Embark on a journey with us as we dig deep into the roots of self-trust, how it shapes our relationships with others and how a lack of it can drive our lives towards constant fear and suspicion. We discuss the troubling trend of distrust within the western male and how, by embracing vulnerability, we can start the transformative journey towards a culture of trust.
We believe that trust is the essence of life, taking inspiration from the boundless trust that newborn babies display. Unfortunately, as we grow, we often lose that innate sense of trust, largely due to societal conditioning around fear and lack. Join us as we delve into how we lose trust in ourselves, the profound impact of this on our ability to love and trust others, and how a scarcity mindset can further exacerbate this issue.
In the latter part of our conversation, we turn the spotlight on self-love and self-trust, crucial ingredients for living authentically. We discuss how fear and self-loathing can blind us from our own actions, leading to a lack of trust in ourselves. We argue that self-respect and self-love are the keys to rekindling trust and recognizing our unique abilities. As we conclude, we touch upon how childhood experiences and the role of religion shape our trust mould, and how breaking free from old stories can help us regain self-trust, paving the way towards a fulfilling life. Tune in for an enriching discussion that will change the way you perceive trust.
Thank you for listening. If you have an idea or message you'd like to share, send us a message: Olivier Egli and Carlos Basurto
Are you ready to break the chains of self-doubt and rediscover trust within yourself?
Embark on a journey with us as we dig deep into the roots of self-trust, how it shapes our relationships with others and how a lack of it can drive our lives towards constant fear and suspicion. We discuss the troubling trend of distrust within the western male and how, by embracing vulnerability, we can start the transformative journey towards a culture of trust.
We believe that trust is the essence of life, taking inspiration from the boundless trust that newborn babies display. Unfortunately, as we grow, we often lose that innate sense of trust, largely due to societal conditioning around fear and lack. Join us as we delve into how we lose trust in ourselves, the profound impact of this on our ability to love and trust others, and how a scarcity mindset can further exacerbate this issue.
In the latter part of our conversation, we turn the spotlight on self-love and self-trust, crucial ingredients for living authentically. We discuss how fear and self-loathing can blind us from our own actions, leading to a lack of trust in ourselves. We argue that self-respect and self-love are the keys to rekindling trust and recognizing our unique abilities. As we conclude, we touch upon how childhood experiences and the role of religion shape our trust mould, and how breaking free from old stories can help us regain self-trust, paving the way towards a fulfilling life. Tune in for an enriching discussion that will change the way you perceive trust.
Thank you for listening. If you have an idea or message you'd like to share, send us a message: Olivier Egli and Carlos Basurto
Why is it so hard for us to trust? Do we even understand what trust means? This is LadyBnone with Carlos and Olivier. Do you feel like humanity is right now on a trusting course, that trust is really spreading, or and trust is really dominant and existing as the glue of society that we all proclaim it is?
Speaker 2:Yeah, I mean, look, it's one of those things where and I think everybody is not paying attention to it and it leads into, maybe, like, this is what society has brought to us, where and I was giving the example where I download an app to get somewhere and sometimes I don't follow the app because I don't trust it but you pointed something out very, very huge. It's like well, what's the opposite of trust?
Speaker 1:Well, that's, that's my point. If we are, if we right now we're not on a course of trust, which I am, I know I'm accusing, I'm very accusatory here, but I don't think that the average person has an outlook of trust when they when they go out into the world. I don't think that marriages are built on trust. I don't believe that businesses are built on trust. I think it's all bullshit. I think, most of all because we have this mindset that already makes it hard for us to trust ourselves, we go out there looking for things to compensate for the lack of trust that we're feeling and the opposite is suspicion. I feel like, more often than not, when I meet someone new or when I go somewhere, try out a new restaurant or go to the movies or buy a car, the confrontation with the service, the new person, a new environment is always tends to be one of this trust, one of suspicion, one where the glasses have empty and I'm waiting for the world to prove me wrong. And that, of course, is not, not primarily, the fault of the world, it's the fault of my own projections. And the projection I think in man is very strong because man have this thing where they know that if you trust the wrong person. We learned that if we trust the wrong person, it's basically like in war you get stabbed in the back, you get stabbed and shot by your own people, and somehow this notion is so dominant, it's so existing, so prevailing in especially, I think, western males, that we have created this culture of distrust where we pretend we're all brothers and we're all friends and we're all cool, but we know that that trust doesn't mean anything, because I see it constantly as soon as she hits the fan. Where's the trusting bridge? Where's the bridge that saves you from the drowning, that saves you from all the things that could kill you or take away your comfort? No one's around anymore. You know and I mean this in a figurative way, of course, but it's crazy how much the level of trust that we're capable of giving and experiencing is dependent on the way we look at the world, and I think that the average male today looks at the world as a place that is seriously missing things and where they have to work hard to fight for their right to exist, for their place, for their achievements.
Speaker 1:And we talked about this before. If you, as a man, think that living as a man is a matter of territorial dominance, of fighting a better fight, then trust is not part of the process. I'm sorry, it's bullshit. Then people use trust in vain. That word is not legitimized in the process. What you actually mean is I don't feel safe. I don't feel safe around you. Let me put everything in a written contract so that once you stab me in the back, I have enough evidence to stab you back. And you know I run a record label and people still are baffled and you know they call me out because I don't have contracts with my artists. And it's something that I noticed in the past.
Speaker 1:When you build a company, especially as a man that deals with other men, and you started from an honest place, you pour into it something that you truly believe, and now you find people who truly want to support your cause. You have to make it as easy as possible for everyone to be trusting, and the only way to do that is authentic, the authentic self, to show up in a vulnerable way and tell your people guys, I know I don't know everything. I know there's a lot I don't know and there's a lot of mistakes I'm going to make, and I beg you to help me Guess what, when you tell that to your people, at first people are shocked. At first people are shocked at the level of. They're shocked about the level of honesty. But then what happens with honesty? Suddenly people open up and they become actually trusting.
Speaker 1:So the culture of trust requires for someone to speak up and say like hey, I don't have all the answers. I actually I'm completely on my own and I'm actually confused. But who? Who does that? In today's time, everybody seems to know everything better than everybody else. Right? Everybody seems to have the better product, have the better service, have to have the better business, the better car. The level of lack of self-trust is showing so much in our ways that we project in the world that of course, we all know we cannot trust each other. I don't trust myself, you don't trust yourself. Now we come together. How are we supposed to trust each other? There's no grounds for it.
Speaker 2:Do you think at one point in our lives, when we're little, we had trust?
Speaker 1:Absolutely. I am convinced and I think there's enough hard evidence that a newborn, a newborn, actually is defined by an incredible level of trust. It's trusting in that it has no choice. When you have no choice, you give yourself into the hands of your parents, right? That is not a sign of weakness, something we need to learn. That is a sign of abundance. The abundant mindset, which means an abundant mindset, is a mindset that knows nothing is missing. Everything is here, the world is perfect, we're perfect right now, we're exactly where we need to be. That's what defines a newborn baby.
Speaker 1:A newborn baby is not born with the attitude of oh my God, I hope I closed that deal, I hope my numbers are up, I hope I'm the best, I hope I'm gonna win. No, that notion is completely foreign to the newborn, because the only thing the newborn wants is to explore itself and, through that, explore its surroundings, right? Well, guess, what is the prerequisite for exploration? What is the prerequisite? How is exploration ever gonna happen in your life? There's one thing you need what's called trust. If you don't trust the process of life, if you don't trust yourself, your decisions, if you don't trust your inner voice, your heart, if you don't trust the path you're not gonna explore. And that's what we see today. We have so many people just stuck in their ways. They might change their car every year, they might move around and update and upgrade their living conditions or change jobs or build new businesses, but they're actually staying exactly where they are. They're just brushing up, you know. They're just updating, polishing what they have. Why? Because there's no trust for the process, there's no trust for life.
Speaker 1:And another good example, I think, is marriage. Marriage today has nothing to do with trust. I have been to too many weddings where I know exactly that, on both sides, the marriage is defined not by abundance but by scarcity. People are afraid of being alone, they're afraid of being alone, and then, once they are married, they are afraid of being left. And so where is there space for trust? There's no space for trust.
Speaker 1:The human glue, the thing that makes us a unity, that makes us all kind of one people, is not existent. Because we are too worried for our own goddamn self. We think that something is missing. When something is missing I think this is an easier way to put it If you wake up in the morning and you look at your life and you don't see all the things, all the blessings you have, but you see all the things that you're missing, the things that you still have to work towards. What kind of feeling does that infuse in you? Fear, right, right. You're fearful because am I gonna get it, or am I always gonna be alone? Will I never be successful? Will I never be wealthy? Will I always be struggling? But the expression of that, what it makes you do, is being untrusting. You're not trusting.
Speaker 2:Right.
Speaker 1:Why you feel like you will always be missing something and people will always give you less than you give them. As a consequence, there's no trust.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:There's no trust. Just bothers me that we abuse the word so much when we are clearly not trusting. We'll still say to our friends next of kin, I trust you man. Yeah, man, I trust you, trust me. We know that it is an insult to say no, I don't trust you.
Speaker 2:I've thrown that word very loosely Until recent. I've really just kind of not said it anymore. It was more of like thinking, just more and more. And that's how we got to this conversation, because it's like seems like everything was all about trust. It was used so loosely, but also, you know, I think what I'm trying to do after even this talk now is I'm sure it's different for everybody when, what part of my life, what age did I lose that trust? What happened to me that I start seeing the whole opposite, Because I mean, as, like you said, as kids we had it, you know.
Speaker 2:That's why we climb trees and why we fall down cliffs, and you know, big because we spoke our mind, we did whatever we wanted.
Speaker 1:I mean, there's just a basic level of trust in a child that drives it to explore, which is to me you know. Later on it becomes like courage, courageous Playfulness, courage, curiosity, openness, these things define. These things define how willing you are to expose yourself to risk in your life.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:But now imagine you lack these things, you will not expose yourself to risk, you will not explore Human beings and men are no exceptions. They have to explore themselves. They have to discover who they are and, you know, become that flower. We have to become the flower that we are meant to be, and it bothers me that we don't do that. We all are the same flower. We all are the same. We all try to be the same, but better, not our own. Why? Because we don't trust the process. Why don't we trust the process? Because our mind is completely filled with scarcity. So you know to ask yourself at what time in your life did you lose? Not the trust in people. It's not about trusting people. Trusting people, that's easy. The hard part is trusting yourself.
Speaker 2:Right.
Speaker 1:It's the same again, like with love. When we talk about love, it's easy to love other people the way we think we love them. The hard part is loving yourself. But you cannot trust other people if you don't trust yourself. You cannot love other people if you don't love yourself. And you cannot neither love nor trust if your mindset is one of scarcity, if you feel like you're always going to be missing something and you have to somehow make up for that lack. You're being left behind. There's not enough. I need to now go and get what's mine, which is such a male thing. Then trust and love is not available to you. I will. I will say it until I fucking die. It's not available to you. These people who are so driven by like I need to get what's mine. I'm gonna fight for my right, I'm gonna hustle my way through this shit, but I trust you, man. You are not capable of trust. There's no such thing.
Speaker 1:We've been educated by movies and by shows and by books that tell us otherwise. In the human makeup, in the emotional makeup of the human being, trust is motivated by a deep sense of enoughness, like I'm good. I am good, and because I'm good and I see that I have everything I have, even if fucking shit falls on my head. That's part of the process. I keep trusting it. Well, if you have that state of being, that state where you know you're not dependent on the world's opinion and on what are the ones from you, and whether or not you're married or whether or not you're rich, where you choose enough, well then trust is available to you.
Speaker 1:But everything else is just, it's a bullshit, scam. It's marketing All these businesses that I work with. They have you know, they put you go to their offices and then they have these banners on the wall. Is it like? Trust creates bridges and we're number one trusted brain? And bullshit has nothing to do with trust. Trust, that is not the same as a product that sells a lot. We make everything about trust. If we actually knew what trust means.
Speaker 1:Trust means to just let yourself go fall into it. You know like, you know these exercises, these partner exercises. I do them with my wife from time to time. So it's like you stand upright, you spread out your arms and your partner stands behind you, right? You close your eyes and then you just drop and you and your partner catches you, right, right, there's almost no one who can just let go. There's almost no one, even though this is, this is your fucking partner. It's been your partner for 10 years, 15 years.
Speaker 1:But we always find excuse she's probably not strong enough, oh she, maybe she's distracted, she doesn't care, she won't do it, I don't know, or I fall. Weird. We find all these excuses not to trust simply because we're not used to letting ourselves go. We cannot fall. We don't have that anymore.
Speaker 1:A baby has no problem. A pet has no problem. A pet that really has no trauma. You know, you get. You get your 10 week old, you know tiny baby pet. Right, get your puppy.
Speaker 1:These things, they just follow you. They just follow around, they chumble around, they eat whatever they drop in the pool. You know they bark at anything. And we then are the ones that teach that creatures, just like we do with the babies, what's right, what's wrong.
Speaker 1:When we do that, we remove trust from these creatures Because now they realize oh shit, yeah, I'm not careful, you know someone's going to step on me, I'm going to overstep my boundaries, I'm going to get told, I'm going to be put in my place. Now, the problem is that if you were really trusting yourself, you will be free. Yeah, you will be truly free. And a person that's free and moves around in the world becomes trustworthy. And because you're trustworthy and authentic, people trust you. And because people trust you and recognize that you trust worthy, guess what you can trust them. That's how trust you know, the waterfall of trust. That's how trust exponentially grows. It's like a spider web, it's, it's, you know, it's an explosion, right, but if at the center it's corrupted, then it's not trust that you're seed. You don't see trust. You actually seed the confused brother. You seed suspicion.
Speaker 2:You said something earlier you can't let someone if you don't like yourself, can't trust someone if you don't trust yourself. So now, now it's kind of like, okay, what have you done to yourself that you don't trust yourself? How do you? How do you trust yourself? You, just like you just said right now, just do whatever you want. No, not so much that, but just he's a thing.
Speaker 1:It all boils down to saying the thing always, always and I will not stop saying that. Actually we had a way of conversation we have conversation about every now and then. You know, we're unaware. People, I'm sorry to say, but humanity is unaware, and it I'm sorry to say it again, but it fucking bothers the shit out of me. People are unaware what you do. People are unaware what they're stuffing their fucking mouth. They're unaware when they go to bed. They're unaware what kind of toxic relationships they're on the day entertained. They're unaware how they're driving. They're unaware how they educate their kids, the things that they're watching, read, the unaware of the very words they say. They hurt people, they hurt themselves just by being unaware.
Speaker 1:Every day I see people overweight, people, consuming food that will definitely put them into an early grave. Why? Because they choose not to be aware and they blame the misery on someone else. Well, guess what? There's no trust in that system. Why? Because there's no self love.
Speaker 1:Someone who beats themselves up with bad food, bad education, who educates their kids, you know, not just poorly, but not at all. Who takes away everyone's liberty, who creates businesses that crush people, that gets them stuck in loans and debt and toxic products. They do so because they really have no self respect. Because if you have self respect, you will be on this planet to do something awesome. You will be here to say, like man, I know things nobody knows and I have abilities nobody has and I have skills nobody has and I'm not going to use that to do something awesome. And that's something awesome is going to be so great, I would be the first to buy it, and the ones who find in a bite they will be better for it. See, that's what would happen.
Speaker 1:But that doesn't happen because people, they don't just hate themselves. The opposite of love is not hate. They're afraid. They're fearful of not getting theirs. They're afraid of not getting getting their share, that part of happiness and money. And you know their thing. It doesn't fucking matter. And you're not on this planet to get a share. You're on this planet to be happy and you're only happy if you show up as your true fucking self. But nobody does why? Because they don't trust the process, because they're too fearful to like her. Know, you know if I, if I brought my truck.
Speaker 2:Nobody will love me. I had to pretend to be somebody else.
Speaker 1:There you have it, and then you know we remain on love, obviously because of all the things we do. Yeah, you can go and talk to a person that hates themselves. You cannot look in at their own self in the mirror. They hate their body. They pretend, you know. They pretend, oh, I love my body, I'm totally okay with whoever. You can say whatever you want. In the end all that matters is how you feel. But you realize that they look at themselves and that reinforces the self loathing and the self loathing is like a closed loop that makes it even harder for them to have any kind of self respect.
Speaker 1:Now, because you don't have self respect, you don't have self love, you don't trust yourself, what you do, what you go with the path of least resistance, which is another piece of cake, or another, you know hit of cocaine, and another, you know some. Some more drugs, more, more spending, more shopping. Whatever the destructive behavior is our preservative way of stroking ourselves, of saying like we might hate ourselves and what we might be fearful, but at least we have that. So we console ourselves. We console ourselves out of our own right of loving ourselves and therefore trusting ourselves. I'm sorry, the divorce rate is skyrocketing bankruptcy rate is skyrocketing, yeah. Default on loans and mortgages, right or skyrocketing. All of that is always the result of the very same thing. It's all the very same thing.
Speaker 1:We get ourselves into these commitments, yeah, that we cannot afford emotionally. Why? Because we for ourselves, have not put in the time and awareness to know what matters to us. Who are we? What do I want? Everything that the baby is here to explore, everything that the newborn tries to find out through its curiosity and playfulness and openness, and because it's of trusting nature. We deny that to ourselves. We say, like you know, Friday is for Cheesecake Factory, Sunday is for, like brunch, Monday is big lunch and then drinking with the boys Monday night, and so on and so on. We forget, we think that, oh, you know, I have a group of people, I'm well regarded and well respected, I'm good. This is ego shit. He has nothing to do with your inner life, it has nothing to do with your heart. It's all just projection of yourself into the world, because all these people that go drinking with you or partying with you, they actually are much more concerned about themselves than about you.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:And trust there. The only trust that exists is like I trust you as long as that's not trust. You see what I just did I trust you as long as I trust you.
Speaker 1:If so you're putting a condition a condition and that is a fucking point I'm making here yeah, if you have a scarcity mindset, you have to cover your ass all the time, right? How does someone and I hope that some of the people listening own a business and know what I'm talking about how do you cover your ass in a business? Contracts, right Agreements, insurances, assurances, warranties they are here to cover your ass. They're the conditional nature of the world. Well, we do the exact same thing when we go out there with the people and we say, like I will love you if you love me, bro, you're my bro If I'm your bro, yeah, oh, I totally have your back if you have my back. Well, guys, this is not how it works. Trust is not a two-way street. It's not reciprocity based. The real trust of nature, universal trust that we talk about here, it's just about giving. It's just about giving. If you only care about trust you get in return, then you're not trusting to begin with. You not, you're full of shit, you're full of cock.
Speaker 2:And you know it's crazy, you say by establishing a contract or putting a contract I think you just made it official is that I'm never going to trust you.
Speaker 1:No, yeah, exactly, exactly you just made it official. It's like what is that saying? I forgot is like trust is good, control is better.
Speaker 2:Right yeah.
Speaker 1:And the KGB worked like that. Yeah, the KGB in the Soviet era of Russia. It was about like, well, there's a system of accountability amongst the people, but it was never clear if something was true unless it was verified. Trust, but verify. So that is an attitude of conditionality, and conditionality always comes from this trust. It's only the mind that is soaked in this trust that asks of itself and others conditionality, nothing else. Conditionality is the expression of this trust, or rather it brings this trust out of you. It's the expression of scarcity. So I mean for everyone to check on the for themselves. Your spouses, I mean, you love them, yeah, but how far would that love go, with that love suddenly turned into hate, if that person were to disrespect you? If that person's only turned on you, with that love turned into, you know, disapproval and maybe like violent repercussions. For most people that's the case, I'm sorry to say. You didn't love that person.
Speaker 1:Yeah, you love that person with a contract she broke or he broke the contract and now you're pissed, now you're going to court. Yeah, it's nothing else. When you, when, when someone, when someone, when someone cheats on someone else and the person that's cheated on goes and keys their car, that's basically just the jury.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:Of the trial deciding that the person that cheated is guilty broke the contract, and I know this. This sounds maybe almost a little bit too enlightened, but ideally, if we love the person and that person suddenly decides he or she wants to be with someone else, we should actually be happy for them and we should be happy for ourselves, because that's the process, that's trusting the process. Apparently, our common path is over. Apparently, now we're ready for something else. Apparently, now we have to open ourselves up to something else. Apparently, our spouse was not happy. I have parent and our spouse needs something different.
Speaker 1:But no, we get all crazy. Why? Because the scarcity mind feels betrayed. The scarcity mind is terrified. I just lost what's rightfully mine. I need to get it back. Yeah, has it ever led to a better world? No way, right, Not once, not once. But we teach our kids son, you're going to defend what's yours. You got to get what's yours. Oh, no, you cannot have her treat you like this Says who what? Right, well, you know. Well, then I'm not going to love her anymore. Then you never loved her to begin with. And trust in the business setting right. We say like, oh, we're all trusting people here, the team trusts each other and then something happens. Now, suddenly, you know, everything turns sour, which is a sign of poor leadership.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:And then you realize that there was no trust to begin with. It was reaches everybody waiting until the shit hits the fan. It was just a matter of time. It was not if, but when. Right man, and we have to be careful.
Speaker 1:I think that's also a little bit what this podcast is about. We use all these words and we forget what they do to us. We forget the weight of trust in nature. Trust is what makes everything bloom and grow and become beautiful. Nothing would happen out there without trust. The tree trusts that winter will be over at some time, that the seedling trusts that if it breaks through the soil it will not be trampled to death. It will actually get a chance to thrive. That's fucking trust. That's crazy. That's trust, nothing else. So you know, next time you wake up and you beat yourself up, just remind yourself holy shit, I really don't trust myself and my life at all. So if that's the case, don't go out there and tell people I trust you, I trust you, we're trustworthy, this is a trustworthy company. Oh, we're trusting member of the community. It's all hogwash and bullshit and you should actually get indicted for that. I mean seriously. I agree. It's misleading.
Speaker 2:But now I guess, to end my section here, what you were talking about. Now it's a good way to actually look at it. When you wake up, don't go out there, just trust in it. You can't even trust yourself, and the more I mean right off the morning, I mean every, every yeah, and that's what I mean with awareness.
Speaker 1:You know, just become aware of how you view yourself, of the trust that you have for yourself, of the love and the respect that you bring to yourself.
Speaker 1:And if you find that there are stories that you're harboring which we all do that keep teaching you you know why you shouldn't trust yourself. An example is if you were bullied at school people get bullied for years they learn to distrust themselves because they know something's wrong with me. People are picking on me, right. That breaks the trust for yourself, but then, at the same time also, you don't trust humanity anymore because humanity was picking on you for years when you were little. So you have to go back and identify these stories, identify all the scarcity stories that you harbor inside of you, and I mean this sit down, do automatic writing journal all the scarcity stories that have taught you not to trust yourself and the world. Maybe you went through a terrible divorce. Maybe you got cheated on when you were younger and you learned, you know, not to trust women and therefore not to trust yourself in a relationship. Maybe something happened with your parents.
Speaker 2:Yeah, that's what I was going to tell you right now.
Speaker 1:Where you learned not to trust yourself because your parents taught they actually told you you're not trustworthy. It happens more often than you think. It doesn't sound exactly like that. It's not these exact words that parents will use, but if your father just tells you two or three times, you're an idiot. You know which? You know, I'm open to it made when I was really little and my father was young. He said that he actually once called me an asshole and it's crazy how much damage that did to me because he was like the guy I looked up to. And now I realized apparently I cannot be trusted. You know, with a bike I will just fuck everything up, boom. There you have it.
Speaker 1:Your sense of self-trust was just that they just broken a little bit and now it only takes a couple more hits and that chip has sailed. Now you grow up still harboring that story deep within yourself, of course, but when push comes to shove, guess what? You're not going to rely on yourself. And that's the fucking thing when it comes, when push comes to shove, for example, should I start a new? Should I quit my job? Should I move to a different city, town, state, country, should I start a business? Push comes to shove. You're not going to do it because of that little story of because of that little story, is that still defining your self worth and therefore is biting into your sense of trust? So you're not going to do it, you're simply not going to do it. So see, before we just talk about trust as this thing, like you know, that sits on a shelf and you can buy five pounds of it and then just spread it amongst your friends.
Speaker 1:It's not how it works. Trust is exactly like love it's the one thing that grows as you give it away Right? But you can only give away what you have right. Exactly If you don't own it for yourself, there's nothing to give away. You can't give away up Hypocrisy. It's so bothersome that all these people say like, oh, I have so much love and you know they love themself. It's like I have so much money to give all of you, but it's all just loaned money with high interest. So they go home and they're going to punch this living shit out of themselves because they gave away what they didn't have. It's not a way of living.
Speaker 1:I invite everyone who discovers in the course of this podcast or maybe just right afterwards, if you're willing to think about that discovers that your sense of self-trust really has taken a hit over the course of your existence. Be gentle to yourself, but sink into the realization and tell yourself yes, that happened. I have a hard time trusting myself. Please acknowledge it. That's what I mean by awareness. Acknowledge the fact that for 30, 40, 25 years whatever what have you you have not been trusting towards yourself and therefore not a trustworthy person and not a trusting person. Take that in sulk in it, like really understand it, but then also understand that it had to happen. You had no choice because of what happened, and then decide I am now ready to let that go. I'm not ready to sink into my own self-trust by letting go of these stories. If you cannot let go of these stories, if you keep those stories alive, you can tell me oh, I'm good now All you want. These stories will come back and bite your ass. You know they will.
Speaker 2:I bet.
Speaker 1:They will they will Crazy man. Highway off on a tangent here.
Speaker 2:No man, but it bothers me, no but it's good, because people question it but don't really know how to get it out there. And this, this shined a lot, a lot of light to not saying it's soft and I'm walking out this door, great. But one thing you did is bring awareness to it and the term trust I mean I knew about. You know, you can't love someone else if you don't love yourself. Now it's time to work on it. I can't trust anyone else if I don't trust myself.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah. So that is. That's a good one. And in closing, let me just tell you it has a.
Speaker 1:There's this thing about religion that makes it hard for people to build trust, because at some point early in their lives the people are highly religious. And I'm not here to judge you, but I just want to say one thing that makes it harder for you to sink into trust is that when you constantly outsource the control, the mastery of yourself to a entity that's out there somewhere above the clouds or in a book or you know, on the mountain or wherever, on the cross, if you constantly outsource that which defines you, defines your happiness, that defines your sadness, that defines your reality, outsource it from yourself, of course, you also take away the power that you have in trusting yourself, because trust is always attached to a sense of self ownership. I know myself, I own myself, I trust myself. But now if you say, like I'm owned by the Lord, oh, I'm owned by the state, oh, I'm owned by my parents, oh, I'm owned by my upbringings, there's no trust in store for you at all because there's no self ownership.
Speaker 2:Yeah, that makes sense.
Speaker 1:And we can debate religion all we want, whereas I have the stance that in religion, the teaching was really about the divinity that we are capable of, the power that resides in us. That is the ultimate source of trust. That, to me, is the message. That is the message. The ultimate message is that you are worthy of trusting yourself because you are a child of the universe, you're a child of everything, you're beautiful, you're part of nature, so you are worthy of it, you're worthy of trust. But if we deny ourselves that right, then we should not be trusted, then we're not trustworthy. I don't trust a person like that. You know, I don't trust these people. I gotta say it's my choice, because I realize they are owned by something else. Yeah, self ownership breeds self responsibility, breeds self accountability, breeds self trust. Woo.
Speaker 2:Man, I love that Well.
Speaker 1:I think we chewed through that one. Yeah, anything else no.
Speaker 2:No, lots of things, but you know what? It was very clear.
Speaker 1:Well, I'm glad you know it's a struggle, it's a struggle because it's a lot, it's multi-layered and anyone who struggles with it is invited to reach out. I gladly take the time and, you know, explain in more detail or give you exercises that can help you. But yeah, man, just take the essence with you and next time you use that word, be aware of what it means and what you're doing. Yep.